Friday 26 October 2018

diving

I am in the water as dolphins splash and whales howl like a wolf.
I start to swim further and further away from the land.
My arms and legs are tired as it is hard to swim in the strong current.
Fish brush against my legs.
A large orange octopus was wobbling and bobbing around in the water below.
Waves were crashing in front of me. I tried to catch one.
The waves pushed me under. Salty water filled my mouth.
When I swim out of the water my wetsuit clings onto my sun-screened body.
A fishy smell catches my nose.

What a great dive. I think I’ll come back tomorrow.

4 comments:

  1. Hello Lily,
    The bits of the writing that I appreciate the most are the final 4 sentences, especially "When I swim out of the water my wetsuit clings onto my sun-screened body. A fishy smell catches my nose." These sentences help me the reader of your writing "join in" with your swim and then catch a fishy smell. It was very clever of you to write about a fishy smell as I and most people know what a fishy smell is and you implied what it could be. cheers Miss B

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  2. Hi again its me Breeze, I like your swimming post. I like your poem with how the wolf learns how to swim it sounds really cool. I think the wolf will not need anymore swimming lessons.

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  3. Hi again Lily, this is me Breeze how come you haven't been posting anymore post in a long time. Every day I look at your blog I always see the same thing. So try to keep posting.

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  4. Hi again it me Mariah,I like how you add heaps of information into your poem. Thank for sharing.

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Thank-you for your positive, thoughtful, helpful comment.